The Good Luck Hypothesis or Walking on Good News

I
Jimmy lay in the emergency room
a blood transfusion in his arm.
One of his socks was on the sidewalk
abandoned at the scene of the crime.
Jimmy had been robbed and shot.
His shoes sat on a hospital gurney.
Doctors pulled a bullet out of his tummy.
A story in the newspaper about a lady
who had recently won the lottery
was read by the robber who’d shot Jimmy
who crumpled and tossed it away.
. . .
II
It all started out simple enough.
Jimmy wanted to test a hypothesis;
wanted to change his luck by the process
of combining superstition and science.
He’d been told by someone, one time,
he couldn’t remember who,
that putting good news in one’s shoe
and walking around town on good news
would change your luck for you.
Or was it, to change your luck
on bad news you had to walk?
. . .
III
Jimmy wasn’t sure which but thought
what the heck, I’ll walk on good news first.
So he cut good news out of the morning paper.
Good news he hoped would make good times later.
The headline spelled out in joy the story
of an old lady who had won the lottery.
He placed the article into his sock,
slipped his two feet into his shoes
and went for a long, long walk
on that old lady’s good news.
. . .
IV
It was his thinking the experiment,
if the experiment was to work,
should be conducted where luck didn’t exist.
Then if all of a sudden he got good luck,
he could argue the good luck he got
was from walking on the news in his sock.
Not the normal every day luck
that every Tom, Dick and Harry’s got;
but a luck achieved where luck doesn’t exist;
now, that would make a scientific experiment.
. . .
V
To insure his experiment would not be criticized
Jimmy walked to the town’s toughest side;
walked through some mean streets and finally arrived
at an intersection where good luck had not survived.
But, before Jimmy could even stand around and wait
for good luck to materialize for him to take;
a robber told him to put his hands up,
and take off his shoe with the bulging sock.
The robber thought the bulge was a wad of money;
but, soon he discovered the bulge was a story
about that old lady who had won the lottery.
. . .
VI
He shook his gun, and began to cuss;
pulled the trigger until his gun went off!
The bullet smacked Jimmy in his stomach
and he fell wounded onto the sidewalk.
The next day Jimmy read the newspaper
as to how he was robbed in a caper;
how he had conducted an experiment
walking on someone else’s good luck;
how he tried to make good luck materialize
by walking on another person’s good news
by stuffing someone’s luck into his shoes.
. . .
VII
Jimmy’s friends stood in the emergency room
telling him the newspaper story about him
made him look like a fool; but to their disbelief
Jimmy grabbed the article about himself,
placed his story in his sock and got dressed.
With bad news in his sock and a stomach that ached
from the emergency room Jimmy hobbled; on a crutch,
away from his friends who stood dismayed; in a bunch.
His friends were yelling, “What is wrong with you?”
As Jimmy commenced to walk on his own bad news.
. . .
VIII
Jimmy decided he’d made a mistake
that it was on bad news he had to walk
instead of good to make good luck take.
So, with crutch, heavy heart and a stomach ache
he commenced to walk on his own bad luck
trying to make good luck take.
He walked back to where he’d been shot
where another robber got him in a drop; but,
before this robber could check his sock
Jimmy told the robber what to expect; that,
the bulge in his sock was an experiment.
. . .
IX
He explained his being robbed and shot;
how he’d decided to change his luck
by walking on his own bad news.
At first the robber looked confused,
then cussed; but holstered his gun into his belt;
with a disappointed look pulled out his own wallet,
and as he cussed handed Jimmy a twenty-dollar buck
mumbling something and walking away
about robbing Jimmy another day.
The next day Jimmy tore the story from the paper
how he’d been given money by a would-be-robber.
. . .
X
Instead of claiming he was a success
he crumpled the story up and gave it a toss.
He wasn’t sure good luck had struck; or not,
after all, being so pathetic a robber gives you a buck
wasn’t the type of story you’d think was good luck.
Jimmy’s experiment walking on good news
hadn’t worked out like he’d wanted it to.
Jimmy had wanted to change his fortune
but he had become a robbery victim;
then the recipient of a robber’s charity.
Neither was something Jimmy wanted to be.
. . .
XI
Jimmy’s experiment made him famous.
He had searched for good luck and success
by mixing superstition and science
and in the process almost lost his life.
But, he discovered a now acknowledged law of physics
that superstitions about luck and science don’t mix.
Jimmy ended up embracing blind luck like everyone else;
his experiment indicated that would be his safest course.
Still, he’d gotten some benefit for his effort;
he’d received charity from the criminal element; yet,
it was not the kind of luck everyone would want
if they had to duplicate Jimmy’s experiment.

[This poem may be copied and used for educational/ scientific purposes with proper acknowledgment of authorship]
Copyright © 2008 by Charles N. Guthrie
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED